Rebecca is absolutely dedicated to helping families in transition. She’s passionate about the welfare of moms and their children and she’ll do whatever it takes to provide them with tools to better their lives. But she knows something’s holding her back from big contribution and success—which is why we’re sitting together. ‘I hate money!’ she says. ‘In my divorce, losing my dad, when I left that horrible job—the money caused pain and struggle and problems. I wish I could just do what I’m called to do and not have to worry about the money. ‘
It was a powerful moment for Rebecca when she realized that the pain, struggle, fear and lack of fulfillment she was feeling weren’t actually caused by money but by the way she was thinking, reacting, speaking and perceiving money and its role in her life. I led her through a simple process to free her from the unnecessary burdens she was carrying.
Money is neutral. It’s just a ‘thing.’
Webster’s dictionary defines money as, “Standard pieces of gold, silver, copper and nickel stamped by government authority and used as a medium of exchange.” Money is a tool for facilitating the exchange of goods and services in an orderly manner. Money acts as a vehicle for giving and receiving “things” that have worth or value to the parties involved in the exchange. Rebecca’s past experiences of loss, betrayal and conflict seemed to be about money—but really the money was merely a prop in the stories.
Meaning is not neutral. Meaning is everything.
We are the ones who look upon a beautiful sunset and make the decision that the world is a brilliant, beautiful, friendly place. Or we may look upon a beautiful sunset and decide that, because we aren’t holding the hand of the perfect romantic partner, nothing really matters.
I’m using the word “meaning” to capture our entire framework of ideas, thoughts, feelings and responses in how we interpret, relate to and encounter life. Meaning is our view of ourselves and the world. There are phenomena of experience and the meanings we make out of them. Many people attach more intense emotion, superstition and unrealistic ideas to money than to almost any other area of their lives. Meaning is not neutral. When Rebecca saw that her thoughts, opinions, and conversation about the past was reinforcing views of herself as a financial victim, she started to regain the power to choose new meaning.
You are the meaning-maker in your money life!
Money is involved in many of the things that define who we are and the things we do. We imbue money, which is the symbol, with its meaning. We trust that a little green piece of paper labeled $10 gives us the power to buy things. We agree to this as we’re purchasing our lattes, paying the power company or contributing to charities.
Rebecca is now creating a wealth vision for her new endeavor based on her spiritual beliefs of circulation, contribution and stewardship. She is choosing to create meaning for the role of money to serve her dreams. Just like Rebecca, you have the power to choose your reactions, interpretations, attitudes and responses to life and create the meaning you desire.
A client’s check bounces. The meaning you attach to the situation is up to you. You could feel a rush of adrenaline and a surge of anger over being ripped off. Or you could assume there’s been an error, wish your long-time client well, and hand the matter back to your bookkeeper for follow-up. What you do with what happens is meaning management, and it is as important as money management.
We give money the power to bring overwhelming peace or utter chaos to our lives. The green paper, the metal discs and the digits on the screen have only the power and meaning we assign them. You decide—as Rebecca did—what is money, really? |
This is me, Rev. Karen and dear Bill, at the top of Boynton Canyon in beautiful Sedona Arizona. We had a wonderful 2009 because we continue to place our spiritual connection first in our lives—in every area. We kept hiking and doing the things we love during a time when we’ve been impacted directly and indirectly by some of the same ‘financial disasters’ that many of you are facing. 